Dating Lessons from Maya-the dog- & Figaro- the cat…
I’m always amazed when single friends ask me for dating advice. They think that since I’m married, I must be in ‘the know.’ I’m privy to information that they need to find that perfect someone. Although I’m honored to be their Dear Abby, I also am baffled. Why do I feel so ill-equipped?
Could it be that last time I was on the market I was not even of legal drinking age? Could it be that when I was dating, there was no Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, etc.? Could it be that cell phones were a luxury used only for emergencies, not necessities? Could it be that the closest thing to Match.com was a friend introducing you to someone? I’m going to go with all the above.
The dating climate has changed quite a bit, but the rules have not. This week I’ve learned a lot just through observing my cat and my dog. After two years, Joe and I went to pick up our male tuxedo cat Figaro from my parents’ house in PA. Back home in NJ, our female mutt Maya was awaiting his arrival.
The first couple of days have been nothing less than interesting. When they were finally reunited, their reactions couldn’t have been more polar opposite. Maya smelled Figaro’s carrier and let out a squeal of excitement. Figaro caught a glimpse of Maya and ran for the hills. The harder Maya tried, the more Figaro rescinded.
Through this entire ordeal, Maya’s reactions made me think of common mistakes women make when they are madly in love. I tried to have a heart-to-heart with Maya about how to win over Fig’s affection, but she just doesn’t seem to want to listen. However, I think that my advice is also applicable to humans. Thus, here’s what Maya and Figaro taught me about the rules of dating:
1. Practice your poker face- Although you may be head-over-heels after the first second of meeting someone, you don’t need to reveal all your cards at once. Let your squeals of excitement out privately. There is truth in the saying “too much, too soon.”
2. Relationships need to be both ways- If you are always the pursuer and never the one pursued, you need to move on. He/she is just not that into you. Face it and find a different tom cat.
3. Don’t come on too strong- An uninvited butt sniff will get you a claw in the face. Let your relationship bloom. There’s no need to be aggressive.
4. Never chase a boy- It gets you nowhere and in the end, your tail will be between your legs.